Tackling the “Die Hard” Christmas Conundrum!

Controversy.  That’s the main thing we try to avoid here at Dad’s Christmas Blog. But sometimes it’s necessary to step in, especially when the subject is as serious and important to society as this one. It has come to the attention of the staff here at DCB (Dad’s Christmas Blog) that over the last several years there’s been one question that keeps coming up: “Is “Die Hard” a Christmas movie?”

”Climb down the chimney, we’ll get together, have a few laughs…’” 

“Die Hard”, the summer blockbuster film starring Bruce Willis. Released on July 15th, 1988, it was one of the year’s top grossing films and made a huge star out of Mr. Willis.

It is regarded as one of the most influential films of the 1980’s and considered one of the greatest action films ever made!

“Oh, the weather outside is frightful.”

Despite being released in July with the full intention of the studio for it to be a “summer blockbuster”, the movie is set at Christmastime.  I won’t go into a lot of plot details here, but the story starts at a Christmas party and there are several holiday references sprinkled throughout the exciting action scenes of Bruce Willis single-handedly defusing a terrorist threat.

“Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta kill one with smaller feet than my sister.”

I’ve seen this movie many times and consider it a favorite, but… (here’s where I pick a side) I do NOT consider “Die Hard” to be a Christmas movie. It’s a great movie, yes, but just because it happens to take place during December and there are some Christmas trees in the background doesn’t cut it.

I got your Jingle Bells right here, punk!

If this were the only criteria, then “Lethal Weapon”, “Batman Returns”, “Iron Man 3” & “Gremlins” would all be considered holiday classics as well. I love those movies too; but come on!  If you removed the Christmas references in these movies, it really wouldn’t alter their basic storylines significantly.

I do not smell.

In my “exhaustive” research on this issue, I’ve read that those on the other side of this argument state that the same thing could be said of accepted holiday movies like “Home Alone” or even “It’s A Wonderful Life”.  Well, I’ve found some holes in that logic.  Yes, you could remove the Christmas elements from these movies and still have a story, but there is a difference. 

“You guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more?”

First, films like “Home Alone” and “It’s A Wonderful Life” were released near Christmas specifically to appeal to an audience celebrating or getting ready to celebrate the holidays.  Whereas “Die Hard”, and the other “not-really” Christmas movies mentioned above, were all released in the summer when blockbuster action movies are most popular. They weren’t originally considered or promoted by their studios to be Christmas movies at all.

“Please don’t make me go back in that Wal-mart.”

Secondly, and most importantly, a Christmas movie should have some scenes of emotional warmth that reflects the beauty and hope of the season. It must do more than mention Christmas to be a Christmas movie.

So, by these standards, “Die Hard” fans are just stuck with one of the greatest action movies ever made, but definitely not a Christmas movie.

“You gotta be kiddin’ me.”

But wait! If you still want to celebrate the holidays with Bruce Willis taking down terrorists, I’m all for it!  Enjoy it with all your loved ones! That’s one of the best parts of this season, and if “Die Hard” is what brings you together, then that’s a beautiful thing.  In that way, it certainly IS a Christmas movie!

“Joy to the world!”

Who says a Christmas cookie must have sprinkles and frosting? If you like Chips Ahoy for Christmas, then those are your Christmas cookies.  If you want a cactus or palm tree instead of a pine, that’s fine too.  It’s not so important how you celebrate, it’s why you’re celebrating that really counts.

Bottom line here:  If you want a real Christmas movie that meets all the criteria, you might want to rent one of the classics like “Ernest Saves Christmas” or “Santa Claus Conquers the Martians”.   

“Know what I mean, Vern?”

If you want to have a great holiday, do something fun with your family or friends and enjoy your time together. (And watch whatever you want!) - DCB

Yippee-ki-yay, Merry Christmas!

Christmas Movies & Dads

It’s not a tumah!

 This time of year, we tend to watch a lot of Christmas movies at my house. My wife and daughters seem to spend a lot of time on the Hallmark Channel. (That's a post for another day.) 

I lean toward the mainstream offerings like "Christmas with the Kranks", "Daddy's Home 2", the holiday works of Mr. Vince Vaughn, or the modern masterpieces like "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation". You know, the classics. 

Son of a Nutcracker!

Well, being a dad, I appreciate a good depiction of a father figure in these movies. Sometimes the dad is a real jerk, like Buddy's biological father (James Caan) in "Elf", or they don't have time for their family, like Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character in "Jingle All the Way".

Maybe they're not such a great dad due to their circumstance like Scott Calvin (Tim Allen) in "The Santa Claus". Usually, these dads are redeemed by the end of the movie and continue as great fathers, happily ever after. (As far as we know.) 

Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver?

The only one I can think of that doesn't earn redemption of any kind is Peter McCallister (John Heard), Kevin's dad in "Home Alone". Probably a nice guy, but I don't care how many kids you have; you don't go on vacation and leave one behind. Twice!!  That's all on you bro!

Keep the change, ya filthy animal!

But I want to talk about the great Christmas movie dads here. The ones that set the bar high for the rest of us.

Howard Langston (Arnold) in "Jingle All the Way", that I mentioned earlier, was actually a pretty good dad. He fought hard to make Christmas special for his son. And he found his own redemption by defeating the evil Dementor (Sinbad) and getting a Turbo Man doll for little Jamie!

Come with me if you want to live!

George Bailey (Jimmy Stewart) in “It’s A Wonderful Life” was a really good dad. He was loved by his family and his community because of his kindness and generosity.  Although stress from work almost put him over the edge, he seemed to have it together by the end.

It's a Wonderful Life, but this kid is choking me!

Ralphie's dad, "The Old Man" (Darren McGavin), in "A Christmas Story" was great dad. Sure, he was a little cranky, but think about how he defended his son's dignity against the "pink-nightmare" bunny pajamas! Think about how he struggled to keep his family warm and fed while battling inefficient heating units and packs of wild dogs.  And I'm pretty sure he personally saw to it that Santa left that Red Rider BB gun for Ralphie! Yep, great dad.

It's a major award!

Then there's Clark W. Griswold (Chevy Chase) from that “Christmas Vacation” movie I mentioned.  Now there’s a dad.  This guy wants nothing more than to spend a “good old-fashioned” Christmas with his family.  His only hope is that he has worked hard enough to earn a big bonus so he can put in a pool. For what? To spend more time with his family! 

Yes, he can be a little goofy, short-tempered, clumsy and sarcastic.  Maybe he can even get a little distracted by a lingerie clerk, now and then. But Clark’s a family man, through and through.  And don’t get me started on that outdoor illumination! What a dad!

We're gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas!

Whatever your thoughts are on this subject, if you want to really appreciate these characters just watch them with your own dad, if you can.  If that's not possible, think about how he would've reacted in these situations. If nothing else it might be good for a laugh.

I’ve been lucky enough to watch many of these with my dad, and I think he’s pretty great. (At least he never left me behind when he went on vacation!)

Pass the popcorn!

-DCB